Shove it, Monday

Most days I'm excited that we're staying for another year.

Today I just want to come home.

I woke up minutes before my alarm went off this morning after having a dream where I was sitting in my parents' living room playing with my dog and watching the snow fall outside. After dragging myself out of bed, through the shower and attempting to do my hair in a way that would perhaps be suitable to Captain Muppet Eyebrows (not really, as he-like Monday-can also shove it) I staggered downstairs and turned on the TV just in time to watch kickoff of the Super Bowl.

Instantly I was flooded with memories of watching the big game crammed into Matt and Lisa's little living room, eating yellow and blue Jelly Bellies in honor of their team (the Rams, of course), then a few years later watching it with Nate, Allison and Ethan, where were were having so much fun just hanging out and chatting that we actually missed the infamous halftime "wardrobe malfunction."

I really don't care about the outcome of the Super Bowl; nor is it too much fun for me to watch here because we don't get the great commercials, but it made me even more terribly homesick nonetheless.

Shortly after that, I grabbed my bags and headed down to the front entryway in my stocking feet to put on my shoes and leave for school. I slipped on the second step and tumbled all the way down the ceramic-tiled flight of stairs. Ow.

Nothing was seriously hurt other than perhaps my pride, but I did get rather banged up and as a result am now hobbling around my classroom like an old lady. I also scared the hell out of Beans, who swelled to the size of four cats and hid behind some shoes, staring at me with huge eyes. Sorry kitty.

Sorry if it seems like I've been doing nothing but complaining on the blog lately. I don't know if it's just a mid-winter (or mid-rainy season, I guess) slump or what. I'm frustrated with a lot of things, mostly job-related, and it's making me second-guess our decision to stay here. Our number one reason for staying is the students. That hasn't wavered-I still love the students to bits and I am confident with that reason for sticking around. The benefits to staying aren't bad, either-more travel opportunities and all that.

There are just some other issues that are frustrating beyond explanation (well, at least on a public website) and are kind of making me wish we'd decided to bail out and just come home. Plus, additional homesickness doesn't help. For some reason I'm painfully aware of just how far away most of our close friends and family are right now, and I'd give just about anything to just be around them. I miss you guys. It sucks.

I don't need big events like Super Bowl parties, right now I'd give anything to just be sitting in my parents' living room tossing a tennis ball to my dog, or just hanging out and being in the mere presence of my friends. I can't have those things, though, they're thousands of miles away and though I'm able to deal with that most of the time right now I'm just not.

Now, though, it's time to go wipe the mascara trails off my cheeks (waterproof...yeah, right) and try to make it look like I haven't been sniffling miserably in front of my computer for the last half-hour because in 10 minutes about 19 7th graders are going to wander in. At least today's lesson is a cheery subject-health and medicine in the Renaissance. Whee.